How to Shift Your Mindset to Love Your Body
This journey shifting my mindset around my body image and learning to love it started several years ago. I actually wrote this post originally back in January 2019 on my old blog and decided to re-share it here because my perspective is still the same presently. And after over 3 years of shifting my perspective to be more positive and uplifting towards myself and my body, life has become so much better!
Shifting my mindset began when I was in a relationship back when I was 23/24. I would nit pick and complain about my body, my tummy, my cellulite, my back rolls, etc. (you can’t really tell in these photos because of the angle, lighting and pose but they are there) Then I realized no guy wants to reassure his girlfriend they look good! They would much rather compliment and admire them.
So I just decided one day that I wasn’t going to complain about my body anymore. I decided I can either make a lifestyle change or stop talking about it.
Mindset shift #1: Stop complaining, no one wants to reassure you look good, they would much rather compliment you!
So just like that I stopped complaining. I kept trying to be healthy, worked out a few days a week, but nothing crazy. And sometimes I was inconsistent, but I would workout for my mental health mostly, to manage anxiety and stress and all that stuff.
Then a weird thing happened. I stopped disliking my body so much. The less bad things I said about it, I just didn’t feel so bad about it.
Mindset Shift #2: Whatever thoughts you keep thinking & speaking about, you believe. So stop saying so many bad things about yourself.
Then I had a crazy thought… what if some guys liked my body as it was? Maybe there were people out there who thought a short, curvy, brunette was attractive?
Ever look back on old photos and think wow I was so cute but I was so self conscious! If only I knew how beautiful I was…
Well I have, and I wasn’t going to let that happen now. I’m in my twenties, I have a nice smile, pretty hair and other physical attributes going for me, I shouldn’t be complaining! Future me is gonna be pissed if I waste my twenties thinking I’m ugly.
Mindset Shift #3: 80 year old you is going to be pissed that you wasted your youth being self conscious about your appearance. Start embracing your beauty today!
So since that change of thought it’s been a long slow process to convince myself into believing it.
That change of mindset helped me end my relationship, because I let go of the fear that no other guy would find me attractive. I decided there are 7 billion people out there, there’s got to be someone!
When I was single I started going on dates and feeling confident. I was pleasantly surprised people didn’t think I was hideous. I actually got pretty good reactions which boosted my confidence.
When I was in Europe I had a hot, chiseled Spanish man tell me I had the perfect body (excuse me, where have you been all my life!) again another huge boost to my self esteem (note to self, seems like European men like curvier women)
Mindset Shift #4: There are 7 billion people on this planet, someone thinks you’re drop dead gorgeous. Start believing it yourself to attract those people.
As time progressed as a single twenty-something, I kept wearing clothes I liked and realized if I felt cute & sexy wearing something, that confidence projected outwards.
So I let go of the need to wear something super short or low cut or tight if I didn’t quite feel comfortable, because I gave off a self conscious energy. Now I’m very aware of how wearing certain things makes me feel.
I wear things I feel hot in! A long sleeve floral dress makes me feel like a goddess (no joke I’ve worn a floral dress to hip hop clubs and totally stuck out but I felt good about myself which is all that matters) and I feel cute wearing leggings, a t-shirt and sneakers too. I think style is such a personal choice, and to each their own. We should all wear what makes us feel our best!
Mindset Shift #5: Only wear things you love and feel good in. You don’t need to follow what’s trendy or “sexy.” You do you!
Also doing little self care activities that made me feel like I was appreciating and taking care of myself aided this self love journey I was embarking.
Personally self care activities I enjoy are having my nails done, curling my hair, taking care of my skin, I also enjoy getting massages and going to acupuncture. Even exercise makes me feel like I’m giving my body a gift and nurturing it. And I LOVE to dance! I feel happy, sensual and free when I’m dancing.
Mindset Shift #6: Self care increases your self love and confidence, and you will show up in every area of your life radiating that energy.
Fast forward to recently and I shifted my mindset to start seeing all the woman around me as goddesses. I stopped comparing myself to other women, because we all look different and are all beautiful. I don’t think you need to be 6 feet tall and a size 2 with Kardashian curves to be considered beautiful. I think it’s wonderful there is so much variety! Plus people are attracted to different features and qualities, so like I said earlier there is someone out there who is attracted to your unique look.
Mindset Shift #7: Every woman is a goddess, the fact we all look different is beautiful and amazing.
A big shift that made me love my body more was focusing on what my body can do. Such as hugging loved ones, exploring the world, tasting delicious food, looking through my camera, feeling sand between my toes when walking on a beach.
All simple human pleasures we take for granted, and not everyone is fortunate to have a healthy body so I’m extremely grateful for this gift! I don’t want to take my body for granted or think negatively towards it again.
During these past couple years I’ve become more appreciative of my body, because it’s my home here on earth. I view it as the vessel through which I experience my existence, therefore I need to treasure and love it.
Mindset Shift #8: Our bodies are our vessels to experience everything wonderful in this life. We must appreciate everything our bodies allow us to do.
So my resolution is to not speak any more negative words about my body and no more punishing it. I will nurture it and treat it only with kindness and appreciation. I’m going to focus on being healthy and loving my body instead of trying to change it.
Loving yourself and being confident is contagious, so I’m doing it for myself and for all the women in my life. Shining your brightest spreads light to all those around you!
Which positive mindset shift resonated with you the most?
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